I didn’t write a love, science fiction, or true story about the war. My story is one of fear, sadness, sorrow, and a terrible happening in one’s life. For that matter, for many lives. As I work so hard to get my story out there, out in the lives of those who need to read that hope is available, I know many people cringe when they read the title. I was one of those people before my daughter, Paula, died. I didn’t even want to think that something could happen to my child as severe as death. I know why I felt like this. It is because I knew that if it did, it would be the worst event that could happen to me. But I didn’t realize it was impossible to comprehend the feelings until it happened to me. Because of it happening to me, I now have this inner emotion that I must, absolutely must, reach out to those moms and dads in the middle of the hurricane of the death of their child. I don’t know why my reaction so many years after Paula died, thirty to be exact, caused me to want to get involved with their lives. I believe this is how it started.
When I moved to Florida, it was very traumatic to leave my home state, where I still had my sisters and their families living there. I also had a beautiful circle of intimate friends I was close to for many years, some for over thirty years. I remember getting off the airplane with Denny and our little dog, Sammy. I was in shock, lonely, and even a little scared. The only happiness I knew was that my other daughter, Ellen, was living in Florida, and I wanted to be close to her for the rest of my life. I loved her and her family and realized this was what I needed. I didn’t want to be thousands of miles away from them. Life is family, life is love, family is love, and I wanted and needed to be close to them. I wanted to be available to them if they needed me.
Now, two years later, I have grown and am still growing every day. I’ve learned that it’s now up to me to make my life with my husband a priority for me. I am an elderly woman, wife, mother, and friend. My responsibility is to be there for my husband, Denny, and do whatever is possible for my daughter, Ellen, and her family when and if they want and need me. This is the number one responsibility because this is the law of nature. If you did a good job raising your children, they are independent and know their responsibility is for their own immediate family. This consists of their husband or wife, their children, and their children’s extensions of their families, friends, and acquaintances.
This is grandma’s wake-up time, her awareness that other family members are busy surviving to live each day of their own life and the lives of their immediate family. It’s happening out there. It’s hectic out there. Life can be scary at times, and now and then, as we witness life, we realize life is not always easy, it’s not filled with fun, and it’s certainly not filled with cozy friendships everywhere we go. We must be strong, vigilant, and wide awake to our surroundings, our business, our interaction with other people, and our trust in others, and especially the most critical insight we must have, which is to be able to control our emotions of words, actions, and expression.
Following is a thank you prayer to God by Carole J. Sluski
In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Jesus, please look over your children, each one of us because we belong to you. You gave us our life because you want to have love surrounding you. You want to fill the earth with people, and I pray to you, to thank you for helping me and for helping others. I want You to continue helping parents, mothers, fathers, siblings, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, and neighbors. Help them if they need You. Let them know You are in their hearts and You can feel them opening to You, coming in even stronger than ever before. That’s a sign of the love You have for them. Let them know this is real. Let them know this is not a fantasy, there is really help for them. Recognize we really need You in our life, we need You forever. And, most of all, the prayer I’m going to say to You right now is I thank You from the bottom of my heart and I know everyone who’s listening to this prayer thanks You from the bottom of their heart. You are not just for me; You are for everyone; You are for all people. You are God in all His Glory, and I thank You for being there for me. And I thank You for being there for the whole world. Amen.
~ Carole J. Sluski